Sexual Purity

Summary: In the days when the apostle Paul lived, sexual activity between consenting individuals was very common, and prostitution was legal. However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage has persisted in almost every age of mam, and in such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body.  This article examines the many reasons why sex outside the bounds of marriage is so damaging to both our spiritual and temporal life.

The apostle Paul wrote, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body” (1 Corinthians 6:18).

Of all the sins mentioned in the New Testament, fornication is mentioned more often than all the others, and the reason why is probably because in Paul’s day sexual behavior between consenting individuals, including both heterosexual and homosexual acts, were common among both the Romans and Greeks. Prostitution was legal and some of the temple worship ceremonies, such as the fertility rites, involved having sex with a temple worker. Therefore, this particular sin was one that Paul had to continually speak out against with the saints because it was so much a part of their culture.

However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage is not confined just to the ancient Greeks and Romans but has persisted in almost every age of man, and has become ever more prevalent in modern times as people accept the idea of “free love.” Where it used to be scandalous for a woman to be pregnant out of wedlock, now it’s used as a reason to provide federal funds to help provide abortions for unwed mothers.

In such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body. They reason that if “everyone” is doing it (which they’re not), and it seems to be accepted by society, then they have difficulty understanding what could be so wrong with such behavior.

This question has had a particular effect on the thinking of the youth of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Many of them want to do what’s right, but they can become confused when the teachings of the church seem to be contrary to what society says is acceptable. When we add to this that young adults have a psychological need to fit in with their peers, it can become hard for them to maintain sexual purity when many of their friends are enjoying themselves in what seems like a harmless activity.

Perhaps we can illustrate the answer to this question by using a situation that most teenagers can easily identify with.

Summary: In the days when the apostle Paul lived, sexual activity between consenting individuals was very common, and prostitution was legal. However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage has persisted in almost every age of mam, and in such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body.  This article examines the many reasons why sex outside the bounds of marriage is so damaging to both our spiritual and temporal life.

The apostle Paul wrote, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body” (1 Corinthians 6:18).

Of all the sins mentioned in the New Testament, fornication is mentioned more often than all the others, and the reason why is probably because in Paul’s day sexual behavior between consenting individuals, including both heterosexual and homosexual acts, were common among both the Romans and Greeks. Prostitution was legal and some of the temple worship ceremonies, such as the fertility rites, involved having sex with a temple worker. Therefore, this particular sin was one that Paul had to continually speak out against with the saints because it was so much a part of their culture.

However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage is not confined just to the ancient Greeks and Romans but has persisted in almost every age of man, and has become ever more prevalent in modern times as people accept the idea of “free love.” Where it used to be scandalous for a woman to be pregnant out of wedlock, now it’s used as a reason to provide federal funds to help provide abortions for unwed mothers.

In such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body. They reason that if “everyone” is doing it (which they’re not), and it seems to be accepted by society, then they have difficulty understanding what could be so wrong with such behavior.

This question has had a particular effect on the thinking of the youth of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Many of them want to do what’s right, but they can become confused when the teachings of the church seem to be contrary to what society says is acceptable. When we add to this that young adults have a psychological need to fit in with their peers, it can become hard for them to maintain sexual purity when many of their friends are enjoying themselves in what seems like a harmless activity.

For most youth, the age of sixteen is a magical number for several reasons, but one of the most important of these is that it’s the age where they can get their own driver’s license, and with that little card comes an expanded sense of freedom. Before that time, whenever a teenager wanted to go somewhere, they always had to ask for someone to take them where they wanted to go, but with a driver’s license, they can go anywhere they want, whenever they want, and without begging someone for a ride.

Summary: In the days when the apostle Paul lived, sexual activity between consenting individuals was very common, and prostitution was legal. However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage has persisted in almost every age of mam, and in such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body.  This article examines the many reasons why sex outside the bounds of marriage is so damaging to both our spiritual and temporal life.

The apostle Paul wrote, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body” (1 Corinthians 6:18).

Of all the sins mentioned in the New Testament, fornication is mentioned more often than all the others, and the reason why is probably because in Paul’s day sexual behavior between consenting individuals, including both heterosexual and homosexual acts, were common among both the Romans and Greeks. Prostitution was legal and some of the temple worship ceremonies, such as the fertility rites, involved having sex with a temple worker. Therefore, this particular sin was one that Paul had to continually speak out against with the saints because it was so much a part of their culture.

However, sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage is not confined just to the ancient Greeks and Romans but has persisted in almost every age of man, and has become ever more prevalent in modern times as people accept the idea of “free love.” Where it used to be scandalous for a woman to be pregnant out of wedlock, now it’s used as a reason to provide federal funds to help provide abortions for unwed mothers.

In such a culture, it becomes hard for some adults, and more especially teenagers, to understand why they must “flee fornication” in all of its various forms, and how it’s a sin against one’s body. They reason that if “everyone” is doing it (which they’re not), and it seems to be accepted by society, then they have difficulty understanding what could be so wrong with such behavior.

This question has had a particular effect on the thinking of the youth of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Many of them want to do what’s right, but they can become confused when the teachings of the church seem to be contrary to what society says is acceptable. When we add to this that young adults have a psychological need to fit in with their peers, it can become hard for them to maintain sexual purity when many of their friends are enjoying themselves in what seems like a harmless activity.

Yet, for most youth, their newly found freedom does have some drawbacks, mainly because they don’t have a car of their own. Therefore, they have to ask mom or dad if they can drive their car. For this reason, most youth dream of the time when they can have their very own vehicle, where they don’t have to ask anyone’s permission to drive. To them, this would be the ultimate freedom!

However, until then, most parents often allow their child to use their car when the child requests it, but it’s clearly understood that the car belongs to the parent, not the child, and it’s also understood that it is a privilege, not a right. Furthermore, that privilege is often dependent on two things. The first is that the child will take care of the parent’s car, and secondly, that the child will drive responsibly. If the parents discover that the child has violated either one of these two rules, the privilege can, and often is, revoked, at least for a period of time, until the child can demonstrate that they’re willing to abide by the parent’s expectations.

This is a situation we’re all familiar with, but often fail to recognize that this same principle applies between us and our Father in heaven.

We’ve been taught that the reason we came to earth was to learn how to become like God, our Father, and since he has a physical body, part of becoming like him is to gain a physical body ourselves. It’s common to hear people say “It’s my body and I can do with it as I want,” however, that statement is not true, at least not yet.

Before coming to earth we had a spirit body, but once we were born into mortality, our spirit was clothed with a physical body. This relationship between the spirit and the flesh has often been described as the spirit “wearing” the earthly body. In this sense, our earthly body is like a garment or coat that the spirit puts on, and as long as the spirit is wearing it, the coat appears to be alive. However, when the spirit takes off the coat and lays it down in the grave, the body becomes lifeless while the spirit continues to live.

Another analogy is that of a car. We can liken the human body to that of a piece of machinery, such as a motor vehicle. It has an engine (the brain), and electrical system (the nerves), a fuel tank (stomach), mechanical levers (muscles), and wheels (feet). If we think of our human body as a car, then we can say that upon birth, a spirit enters a car and after putting some fuel (food) in the tank, and operating its levers, the spirit can use its body to go places and do things.

As with all cars, things wear out and break down, and when that happens the car doesn’t work as well as it once did, and eventually the car will stop functioning to the point where it can’t be repaired. When this happens, even though someone healthy is sitting behind the steering wheel, the car can no longer respond to the driver’s actions. At this point, the only thing the driver can do is get out of the car and walk away from it. This is what happens to our body when we die of old age or natural causes.

We didn’t come to earth on our own. Instead, it is our Father in heaven who sent us here, and it’s our Father in heaven who has allowed us to be clothed with an earthly covering, or who has given us this marvelous piece of machinery called the human body. As such, our bodies don’t belong to us. They belong to God, our Father who allows us to temporarily enjoy using it. And when we die, that gift is taken away, and we no longer have any access to it. Therefore, our bodies are merely on loan to us from God for a short season. This is why Paul said, “What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?” (1 Corinthians 6:19).

Since our bodies belong to God, and he’s given us very explicit instructions on how to take care of it and what kind of things we should and shouldn’t do with it, when the time comes for us to give our physical body back to God, we’ll have to give an account for how well we took care of what God has lent us. Paul explained it this way: “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad” (2 Corinthians 5:10).

If we’ve followed our Father’s instructions and did what we could to properly use what he gave us, then we’ll be given our very own body that will be ours forever. But if we didn’t take care of what God lent to us while we lived in mortality, then God will not give us the kind of body he has, which was one of the main reasons we came to earth to obtain.

There will be some who’ll say that the scriptures tell us that everyone will be resurrected and receive their body again from the grave (1 Corinthians 15:22), however, that’s not exactly what the scriptures say.

It seems that the ancient saints living in the city of Corinth had a question about the resurrection and what it would be like, and so Paul addressed this topic in one of his letters. He explained that here on earth there are different kinds of flesh. For example, men have one kind of flesh, beasts have a different kind of flesh, fish have a yet another kind of flesh, and so do birds (1 Corinthians 15:39).

Paul when on to explain that it’s the same in the resurrection, where God will give each person the kind of body that pleases him, according to the deeds done while living in their earthly body (1 Corinthians 15:38). And, just like there are different kinds of flesh here on the earth, so also in the resurrection there will be different kinds of bodies, and some bodies will be more glorious than others (1 Corinthians 15:40-42).

Paul also explained that the body we lay in the ground is corruptible, meaning that it’s subject to disease and decay, but the body we’ll have when it rises from in the resurrection will be incorruptible, meaning it will never decay or die. Although it may look like our natural body does now, it will be a spiritual (not a spirit) body (2 Corinthians 15:43,44). Therefore, even though our physical bodies will rise from the grave, in some ways we don’t presently understand, they will be very different than the body we now have.

Going back to our illustration of a car, right now our corruptible body is like driving a beat-up jalopy, but it’s better than not having one at all, so we shouted for joy at the prospect of getting one and having the chance to take it out for a spin. However, the time will come when we will be given our very own physical body and we anxiously look forward to the time when we can trade in our corruptible body for a glorious one that will never rust or wear out. But the kind of body we’ll receive in the resurrection depends on how well we followed the rules and instructions our Father gave us when he lent us our mortal bodies.

To use an analogy, let’s say that those who are worthy of inheriting the celestial glory will be given a Rolls Royce to drive, while those who go to the terrestrial kingdom will be given a bicycle, while those who go to the terrestrial kingdom will be given a new pair of shoes for transportation. Of course, this is not what will actually happen, but it illustrates that there will be marked difference between these three resurrected bodies.

If our earth life is meant to help us become like God, and he’s our Father, then to become like him we too must become eternal fathers, and to do that means having children. But to have children requires a body that’s capable of producing spirit offspring, and only those who inherit the celestial kingdom will receive that kind of a body.

Those who used their bodies as fun toys instead of as sacred instruments in this life, will not be given the kind of body that God has. Instead, the body they’ll receive will be far inferior. Instead of living with God in the celestial kingdom and enjoying a fulness of joy, they’ll spend eternity with a spiritual body that will be very limited in what it can do, and that difference will be like that of driving a Rolls Royce compared to riding a bicycle or walking.

When people use their bodies for the purpose of going to places of temporary fun, excitement, and pleasure instead of using them responsibly according to the manufacturer’s instructions, someday they’ll be trading in their old jalopy for a pair of shoes, when they could have traded it in for a brand-new Rolls Royce.

But there’s another dimension to sexual purity that’s even more important to the here and now. Imagine a young man who goes out to a car lot and sees a shiny car. Desperate to have a car of their own, they impulsively buy a vehicle based solely on its outside appearance without looking at the engine to see what kind of shape it’s in. Once they pay the cheap price, they proudly drive the car off the lot with a feeling of exhilaration. But in time, they discover that the car starts giving them problems, and before long, the car starts costing more and more money to keep it running until in time they end up spending more money on the care than it’s worth.

This is exactly what happens when a young man sees a pretty young woman. She looks all shiny on the outside and in his exuberance, he pays the cheap price to take her out for a night of pleasure. At first, he feels proud of his accomplishment, but in time he keeps paying a higher and higher cost for his decision. in the form of failed relationships with women. And this same principle applies equally as well to women.

Buying a car is a major decision because you want one that will be dependable for a long time, and to do that a person needs to be more concerned with how well the engine and other parts of the car work than how pretty it looks on the outside and what kind of fancy accessories it has.

In the same way, when looking for a spouse, a person needs to pick one who will provide a long and dependable marriage relationship. To do this, a person has to look past how good-looking someone is and instead look at the heart of the person they’re interested in, examine their character, and see how committed they are to their covenant of marriage. And then, just like a car, once someone has signed an agreement with the wearing of a wedding ring, they have to perform proper maintenance on their marriage to keep that relationship running smoothly, otherwise it will start to cough and sputter, and develop all kinds of troubles.

If someone is used to using their body for temporary thrills and personal gratification, such an attitude will eventually have an effect on a marriage. When the good looks and vitality of youth fades, the temptation will be there to look elsewhere to satisfy one’s desire for the “good old days” of fun and excitement. To maintain a happy marriage takes a lot of work, and there are many things than can cause it to fail, but nothing ruins a marriage faster than infidelity. Couples can argue over finances, household chores, and the raising of children, but once someone discovers that their partner has been cheating on them, the hurt felt is so deep that it’s almost unrepairable, and the reaction to that hurt can border on hate.

Physical intimacy in a marriage is rightly called “love making” because it is (or should be) a genuine expression of love, where one partner seeks to please their spouse in a very intimate and uniquely personal manner. To love someone means to do something for them that makes them glad to be with you. Love is not selfish, it’s not vain (puffed up), and it never demands. Rather, love is giving of one’s self with the intent to make someone else happy, and one of the ways, out of many, that this kind of love can be shown in a marriage is during physical intimacy.

However, when someone engages in sexual activities outside of marriage, it’s not to make someone else happy but to make themselves happy. It’s an act of self-gratification, which is actually an act of self-love, where a person cares more about themselves than the other person. And that kind of attitude is reenforced each time such a person has sex with someone they’re not deeply in love with.

Then, when that kind of person does find someone they want to marry, that attitude is carried into their bedroom. When they have sex with their spouse, it’s not love making. Instead of caring about pleasing their marriage partner, they’re main objective will be to please themselves, because that’s what sex means to them, and in time that will have a debilitating effect on the marriage. In time, the unhappy spouse will find no pleasure in being intimate with their partner, and when that happens, their partner will be tempted to start looking around for someone else to get the personal pleasure they want but are no longer finding at home.

By learning to control one’s sexual desires before marriage the more likelihood there is that they’ll be able to control it after marriage. To do otherwise is to risk damaging one’s future – both in heaven as well as on earth for a temporary moment of fleeting pleasure. Such is the price paid for a lack of sexual purity.

 

Related articles can be found at The Nature of Marriage